Behind on Your Goals for the Year? Here’s What to Do Now

It’s the end of March. We’re one quarter of the way through 2018. If you’re like most people, you started the year with goals and plans for the things you wanted to accomplish. If you’re smart, you broke down your goals for the year into steps you would take and planned how you would accomplish those steps week by week and month by month.

You set out to follow those steps. Really you did! And with good intention and commitment. And it’s the beginning of April and you didn’t get all of them done and even though the year isn’t over, you’ve already fallen behind.

Does this sound familiar? It should. It’s what happens to most people who set goals, especially “stretch” goals for themselves. Did you know about 80 percent of those who make New Year’s resolutions have failed at those resolutions six weeks into the year? It’s not just New Year’s resolutions–most people who set goals for themselves fall down on those goals somewhere along the way, so you’re far from alone or unusual.

If you are someone who feels like you are further away from your goals than you would like to be, here are 4 pieces of advice for when (inevitably) you fail to meet your own expectations.

  1. Don’t give in to all-or-nothing thinking.

People get discouraged, and it’s easy to give up. But it’s what you do now, after your initial plans got derailed, that really matters. So you weren’t as perfect as you thought you should be. If you abandon your goals now, you’ll be throwing away whatever work you did do.

 

To read the rest of the article, click here

 

 

A new day is on our horizon and we are the best and only ones that can create our future.  Not our bosses, not our spouses or significant others, and not our friends or families. Just us.

Have you asked yourself, what’s the story you want to write for the future you are creating for 2018?!

Like some of you, I watched Oprah’s amazing acceptance speech of the Golden Globe’s Cecil B. DeMille lifetime achievement award (she’s the first black woman ever to receive the award in its 66-year history) and I had goose bumps.

“For too long women have not been heard or believed if they dared to speak their truth to the power of those men, but their time is up,” she said. Her words spoke to me of ‘leaning into’ our lives powerfully in ways we may not yet have done and her speech had a broader impact on me beyond the torment, abuse and assault that inspired the #MeToo or #TimesUp movements which she focused on that evening. I too wonder if I am strong enough and powerful enough to look at the life I want and take bold steps to get there.  If you missed it or just want to watch it again, Click here.

So what you ask? I do not think it is enough to be inspired, although it feels great in the moment.

The harder questions are,

What will you do with your inspiration?

What action will you take to step into your full potential to create a powerful future for yourself?

If you hear a whispering in your heart calling you towards something you do not yet have, but want, if you are a woman, you can come to our upcoming 2018 Women’s Leadership Programs that are designed to help you take action, be bolder and create a brighter future for yourself. If you’re a guy, or a woman who cannot attend here are 3 tips to help.

Hire yourself a coach to nudge and support you into your greatest self

 

Hang out with people who stretch and inspire you

 

Find a new tribe of support that you learn from and grow with and attend with some regularity

 

Remember leadership is a practice. What are you doing to practice lately?

Warmly,

Wendy Capland | CEO Vision Quest Consulting

 

, , , , , , ,

We as women often undercut, minimize and shortchange ourselves.

What the heck? Are we still doing this? Really?

Don’t you wish we could stop this crap once and for all and step into our full power without apologizing or bing afraid. I’ve given this a lot of thought and here are 9 things you can stop doing ASAP to claim your power and take your seat. Using minimizing language.

Women use words that minimize their own impact. Like ‘just.’ ‘Let me just tell you something.’ ‘I just wanted to stop you for a minute.'” That simple word sends the subtle message that our statements and opinions aren’t that important.

Another belittling words women are prone to using, ‘I’m feeling a little bit concerned about something.’ I doubt you’re really feeling just a little bit concerned or you probably wouldn’t have mentioned it. You are concerned so say so. What’s a minimizing word you could eliminate

Apologizing.

Women are prone to apologizing when there’s no reason to do so. Many women’s voicemail messages begin, “I’m sorry I’m not able to take your call right now.” Even in our voicemail, we apologize!” Cut it out! In what on-going scenario at work, could you stop apologizing?

 

Asking permission.

Women are prone to asking questions when they already know the answers, We don’t want to be too overpowering, and we want to get buy-in up front. So we tend to ask permission to say something when there’s absolutely no need. Do you have a habit of asking a question in order to break the ice to enter an important conversation?

 

Waiting until we’re experts before taking on a new role.

Often when offered an opportunity, women will feel like they need to be fully skilled before taking it on, while a man given the same opportunity will say, ‘It’s about time they picked me!’ Men will say, ‘I’ll take the job and figure it out when I get there.’

Age doesn’t seem to make a difference. I just talked to two 20-year-olds, one man, one woman, both unhappy in their jobs. The woman says she wants to get a new job but doesn’t know what else she can really do. The man says, it’s no problem; he’ll just get another job because he’s so marketable. Is there some role or job that you’ve had your eye on that you might be holding yourself back because you think you are not ready?

Not setting clear goals.

You have to be really clear about what you want. Do you want a promotion or a job change? Funding for your new company? Do you want to write a book or be a keynote speaker? Being clear allows you to set priorities and boundaries. You’re going to have to make big asks. If you’re wishy-washy about what you’re going after, everyone else will be too. Declare one clear goal and tell someone else to see if you have said it with certainty.

Only setting goals we know how to reach.

Don’t be stopped from setting a goal because you don’t know how to get there. No one knows exactly how when they start out setting a goal where they’re stretching themselves.

Years ago, I found myself declaring during a workshop that I wanted to have my own television show. As soon as I said it, I thought, ‘I have no idea how to do that. What a stupid goal.’ But a woman in the audience came up to me and told me she was being interviewed by a cable show next week, and invited me to come along and observe. I decided this was a good way to see what it was all about. I believe you can head toward a big goal one baby step at a time. In fact, it may be better that way, as you’ll avoid setting off your own fight-or-flight response. Eventually I wound up with my own cable program, which ran locally for three years had 2.5 million viewers. And then I was on NBC. Who knew? Could you be holding yourself back in some area because you don’t know how you are going to pull it off? My coach told me this morning; everyone who is on the leading edge figures it out as they go along.

Not setting clear boundaries.

Once I had done the cable show for three years, I felt done with cable. My next stretch goal was to get on local affiliates of ABC or NBC. So when a woman invited me to do a cable TV series with her, I declined. Create some non-negotiable boundaries so you can say yes to things that lead you toward your goals and no to things that would distract you. What is something you need to say no to?

Worrying too much about relationships.

That “no” on the cable series was harder than it should have been. I was really clear that it was a no for me but I think the woman was surprised and not too happy. I noticed I cared more about hurting our relationship by saying no–even though I didn’t even know her. Is there a relationship you are worried about rocking the boat but in truth, it is blocking you from moving forward?

 

Failing to build a personal brand.

A strong personal brand will help you get what you want whether you’re working in a company or running one of your own. The first way to start to develop a personal brand is to deepen your own self-awareness. What makes you stand out positively from other people? What is your superpower? A personal brand is an asset that defines the best things about you. It’s the impression people have of you, and the impression you want them to have. What is one step you could take this week to help you towards developing your personal brand?

 

 

, , , ,

Life is not measured by the breaths we take, life is measured by the moments that take our breath away!

When was the last time you took your own breath away?

 

…To develop yourself

…To unleash what your capable of

…To let your potential be your guiding light

…To use your gifts and talents to the fullest?

…To be aligned and on purpose in most everything you do?

Isn’t it time? #TimeIsNow

Here’s to your boldness!

Chief Executive Officer, Vision Quest Consulting

 

, , , ,

The Best Way for Women to Reduce Stress

I am reading the book “This is not the Life I Ordered”, I would like to share a passage.

“According to a recent UCLA study, our connections to women friends actually counteract the stress most of us experience on a daily basis. Engaging in a “tending and befriending” behavior counters stress in women and produces a calming effect.  Not only do our women friends soothe us, give us encouragement, and help us remember who we really are, our friendships might even save our lives.

A famed Nurses’ Health Study from Harvard Medical School found that the more women friends one had, the less likely the woman was to develop physical impairments as they aged and the more likely they were to lead a joyful and meaningful life.  In fact, the results were so significant the researchers concluded that not having close friends or confidants was as detrimental to a woman’s health as smoking or carrying extra weight.

Don’t let one more minute pass without reaching out to a woman friend and build into your daily routine a way to connect with another woman.

, , , ,

Have you ever thought of how a personal Board of Directors might help you?

A personal Board of Directors is helpful if you are looking to get promoted, climb the corporate ladder, or just generally grow yourself professionally but you aren’t sure quite how to do it. Creating a personal Board of Directors is a fantastic way to guide, mentor, and coach yourself to get somewhere that you are not yet.

We all need extreme support (you can read ore about this in my book, Your Next Bold Move) in order to grow professionally.  We often surround ourselves with people like us, which doesn’t give us much diversity of thought to challenge our assumptions and our belief patterns.  I’ve had a personal Board of Directors for years and I change individual seats as I continue to grow and grow bolder in my sights and execution

 Types of People that might change your perspective regarding Your Personal Board of Directors

  1. The Committed Listener – someone who is interested in you, who cares about you deeply, and gets you at your core (understands what matters to you most)
  2. The Catalyst – someone who pushes you to grow and who mentors you to get there
  3. The Wise Elder – someone who is 5-10 years ahead of you who helps you see the big picture
  4. The Wise Younger  – someone who is younger than you are by 5-10 years ad provides a different perspective

Reading the roles above, you probably have some of these roles filled and most likely need to look to fill one or two. Although I have a wise younger on my Board, I don’t think I spend enough time with her and will look to change this next year.  Wouldn’t this be a great goal for all of us in 2018 to build our personal Boards as we start a new year to become more of our best selves and unleash our potential more and more to make our next bold move!

Remember, leadership is a practice and requires constant attention to grow ourselves and our leadership to the next level. You can email me at info@visionquestconsulting.com to let me know if this was helpful for your future career development.

Here’s to a successful year ahead!

Chief Executive Officer, Vision Quest Consulting

, , , , , ,

“It’s a shame not to win in your own fantasy.” says Anna Huckabee Tull

So I ask you…Do you know what your professional fantasy/dream is?  I am in the middle of creating what’s next for me…aka my fantasy.  I LOVE this stage of thinking about what’s next, imagining what I will do, and who I will work with to do it.  All this LOVE gooey feeling happens of course only when I’m not thinking I’m crazy or worrying about how I will ever pull it off.

And then I read this great line…It’s a shame not to win in your own fantasy. What a novel idea! It occurred to me in this light bulb moment that since I am the creator of my own dream about what’s next, maybe the way to think about it, plan it, envision it, is to imagine the big idea I REALLY want, not the one I am afraid to dream about because I’m either afraid, clearly don’t know the right people, and have no clue how to make it work.

Yet.

I don’t think I’m alone on this one. I think every one of us has a next move ready for us to dream about and start to launch.

Did you know that our minds easily realize the difference between reality and imagination. However, it is not imagination but dreams or other altered states of consciousness where our mind fails to realize the difference between reality and what we are imagining.

So what’s yours?

Can you see it in your minds eye?

Can you feel it inside your body where it feels like butterflies are dancing on your gut?

If you didn’t hold yourself back is there something you are imagining that makes you giggle with the sheer joy of the imagining of it?

Yup.  Me too. So what do we do next?

Some ideas. You could always read my book, Your Next Bold Move for Women, which will give you a template to follow, even if you are a guy. You could always use the 10 Tips from the email I sent out a couple of weeks ago, listed again below. You could hire yourself a coach to help you navigate these strange waters and help you blast through your own self limitations and worries (that’s what I’ve done). You could create a vision board for yourself (google it, there are lots of online resources and ideas to get you started).

Here’s the thing though.  Do something! The idea is to create a clear vibrant vision of what you want.  So clear you can hardly sit still with the excitement you feel every time you think about it.

So go for it.  And let me know how it’s going.

I am a believer that the fastest strategy ever is beginning with the big dream.

Here’s to your boldness (and of course your dreams),

Wendy

The Secret to Making Your Work More Awesome

Everything you do at work can be categorized as either bad…good…or great.

Let’s see how you measure up.

Write down what you do work wise that you would call BAD work.

What is BAD work? Bad work is mind numbing, soul sucking, the 3 hours you just feel was wasted being in that stupid meeting, something you are doing that you would consider a waste of money, bandwidth and/or time.


Make another list of what you do at work that you would call GOOD work.

What is GOOD work? Good work is written somewhere in your job description, it’s productive work, it’s what your boss expects and wants you to do, it’s important work.

Now make a 3rd list of what you do at work that you would consider GREAT work.

What is GREAT work? Great work is work where you feel like you make an impact. It’s work you do that makes a real difference. It’s meaningful work that lights you up and your people up.

Now…here’s where the rubber meets the road….

Ask yourself how are you spending your time right now at work?

Take out a piece of paper and draw a big circle on it. Break the circle into 3 segments of how you are spending your time…percentage of bad, good and great work.

COACHING QUESTIONS
Now ask yourself,
1. What do I notice about my pie chart that makes me happy?
2. Not so happy?
3. Do I have the right mix for me, my team, and my organization at this time?
4. How do I get to do more great work?
5. If I could find one thing that would be great work (like a great work project), what might I do?

Remember, leadership is a practice and requires constant attention to grow ourselves and our leadership to the next level. Try this and let me know what you discovered. You can email me at info@visionquestconsulting.com.

, , , , , , ,

I believe strongly that you should be the one to manage and navigate your own career instead of waiting for someone else (your boss, the CEO, Human Resources, or the Universe) to offer you your next opportunity.

Create your own damn future and stop waiting to be noticed, tapped, or promoted.

How do you start? I’m glad you asked. One great place to start is requesting that your boss meet with you regularly; I call these one-on-one meetings or roll up weeklies. You can run these meetings once a week or every other week but no longer than that. Yes, once a month is too long in-between these kinds of meetings and no, it does not count if you meet with your boss on other topics regularly, this is different and should be treated as such. These meetings can be as short as 30 minutes in length although I prefer an hour.

What do you do during this time?

Here is a format I recommend to structure the time most efficiently and to get the most out of it for yourself.

Topics to cover with your boss or to suggest as a format for your employees to meet with you…

1. What I did this week
2. What I feel most proud of
3. Things you should know
4. Things I need from you
5. What my goals are for next week

Remember, leadership is a practice and requires constant attention to grow ourselves and our leadership to the next level. Try this and let me know how it turns out. You can email me at info@visionquestconsulting.com.

, , , , ,

To help you discover your true purpose in life and create a new future, there is a primary question that’s really powerful.

When you meet someone for the first time, instead of asking them what they do, ask them instead…

Why do you do what you do?

This WHY question gets at the heart of what matters most to us and in what arenas we have passion. Spend a few minutes and answer these two questions for yourself.

WHY do I do what I do for work? and …How can I bring more fulfillment to my work?

Do you realize that if you don’t have work that you feel passionate about and linked to your purpose, you will most likely feel some level of despair? How do you know if you are doing purposeful work? Take out a piece of paper and complete this formula below. I found it very inspiring for myself and am using it with each of my clients to figure out how to shift their current work so it feels more purpose driven.

Your strengths + Your passions + Your Values = Your calling (your purpose)*

Imagine you and those around saying..”I love my life. I get to wake up every morning to do something I love. I get to inspire people to do the things that inspire them. It’s the most wonderful thing. In fact, the best part is trying to figure out all the different ways I can do this more. It’s really amazing!”

*The Napkin Test by Richard Leider